Dear Katie Holmes….

Dear Katie Holmes,

You are a beautiful woman with the body, confidence and means to wear almost anything. Did you notice that I said almost? Yes, Katie, I said almost. 

First, you need to know that you have a large noggin. I have heard that celebs often have big heads, something about photographing better than the rest of us. This is fine, nothing to be ashamed of. No one even notices your giant melon… until you top it with a too small hat that is forced to sit atop your head like a cherry on an ice-cream sunday. You are a stylish lady with stylish friends and an army of staff at your disposal. I cannot believe that a stylist hasn’t mentioned that your hat doesn’t fit. I know she just had a baby, but your bff Posh Spice hasn’t found a moment to call you and recommend that you stop stealing hats from Suri? Aren’t you worried about the wind? These hats are going to blow right off their perch at the tippy top of your head with the next stiff breeze.

I am really not trying to be mean. I, myself, have the opposite problem. I have a pin-head and thus will never be famous. Regular hats cover the tops of my ears and I have to buy junior-sized hats. I feel for you. Sometimes you see a cute hat and you want to make it yours. all I am asking it that you look in the mirror and be honest with yourself.



photos from here, here, here, here and here


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